Saturday, February 26, 2011

Apparently Im sane lol

Miles and I had our counselling appointment yesterday.... apparently we are both sane hahaha. Although, I still think this is debatable! lol We talked with the therapist about many different things...she specifically asked Miles if he thought it would be really hard on me to give up the baby. We talked about "what ifs" and how I felt about termination and stuff and relayed the whole story on how we met A and D. She was super nice.

After our appointment, we met up with A for lunch at the Noodle Box as per a friends recommendation. Damn was it good! lol The three of us had good conversation as we always do (I feel really at ease talking with her). And she was telling us how they were sent the donor profiles!!! They will go over them over the weekend, and call the clinic in the states on Monday with their list narrowed down...and hopefully decide from there. I was super stoked when she said that, because it really means, that we are merely a few weeks away before the transfer. How exciting is THAT!!?!??!

On a side note...Im starting to wonder if anyone is actually reading this lol If you are, feel free to comment! lol Just not negative nancys please!!! Im pretty open so if you have a question, ask away and if I can and am comfortable doing so....I will!!!

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

WHEW! I worried for nothing lol Aparently the high level is nothing to worry about and it wont change the progression of things YAY!!! I start birth control next week when AF comes and then 15 days later, I start Lupron injections. OMG! The nurse I talked to at PNW was AWESOME. Totally nice. She sent me a calendar of what we could be looking at in terms of a schedule of meds and stuff...and it looks like April 16th area is when we will have a transfer! Its so crazy exciting. A and I have been emailing back and forth and were both like "holy shit!!" lol its so awesome! Im giddy and have a permagrin and keep looking at the calendar thinking...its not so far away!!! I want to start the shots!!! lol Woohoo! Its happening!!!


I feel so frusterated!!!!

So, because we are using an American fertility clinic for the eggs, I need to do their testing which means that I had to take an additional thyroid test. And while Im glad that Ive found out now that I aparently have a thyroid issue, as it means I can get on meds to help it, Im worried that it will set us back.

I found out today (because we have this thing called ehealth that allows you to check your lab results online) that my thyroid peroxidase is sky high. With a preferred ranged of under 35....mine was 395!!! From what Im reading through my research on it on the internet (oh...the joys of internet...causing hysteria in hypochondriacs since 1992), it seems like I likely have hypothyroidism which shouldnt be a big deal and can be treated with a pill a day (probably for the rest of my life). My worry is that it will affect when the transfer will occur. I keep thinking, things are going so smoothly right now...theres gotta be a blip. Well, here it is.

Maybe I shouldnt worry...I dont know. Im not suprised I could have a thyroid issue. It runs in families and I know I have relatives with hypothyroid. But its just too bad I didnt know before so I could already be on track and my levels good so we could proceed without this roadblock, but alas, its not the case. Argh!!!!!!!

I will be talking to the clinic in Seattle tomorrow morning for my telephone interview with them since I havent had that yet and hopefully, Ill have some clarity on where to go next. But all I can say is right now, Im discouraged. ARGH!!!!!!! 

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Quick update

We are working on the contract and getting it done...once thats done, we should be moving along pretty quickly here! Ill need to be on meds for 6 weeks, and since I havent started them, my hope for a March transfer is not looking great...but hopefully April!Fingers and toes crossed!!! Counselling appointment on Feb 25....March 10 appointment with the Dr. So excited!!

Friday, February 11, 2011

Moving along...slowly!

So on tuesday I had my hysteroscopy! It went pretty well! I took the train in from MR to Van at 6am (way earlier then I even THINK of getting up lol) for my 8am appointment. I forgot to take the 2 advil as requested before hand so was a little nervous but the nurse, Jeannie, quickly put me at ease. She took me to a curtained off area with this big fat lazy boy with masager in it lol and lead me into the washroom where I could undress from the waist down and put on a wrap around gown. After that, I was lead into the procedure room and onto the table with the stirrups...and not the ones in the drs office that you just rest your feet in but the ones you put your legs in. She took a great deal of time, trying to make sure I was comfortable (I think I was being pampered a bit too much lol). She explained the procedure...that the dr would put in a speculum slightly larger then the one used for a pap...then I would feel a pinch when she puts the clip in to hold my cervix open.She said I would feel some cramping, a little worse then menstral cramps and said we were going to breath through it together and proceeded to show me how to breathe lol I informed her that Ive had three natural child births...Im a pro at breathing and she was suprised, not realising I was there for a surrogacy lol. She said "And your going for a 4th!?" so I informed her of what I was doing.  Soon after, the dr came in and here I was , in stirups spread eagle lol and shes like "Hi Darshan...we havent met yet..Im Dr Taylor" to which I responded "Hi! Your going to get to know me really well today!" lol (Im like Chandler from friends...use humour in uncomfortable situations lol)
And the procedure began! She put the speculum in, which was the most uncomforatble part of it really. I barely felt anything, but saw so much! After the camera was inserted, I could see the inside of my uterus and I personally thought it was totally cool!!! She showed me where the falopian tube entrance was just too cool. And then it was over. Very quick! No pain, no cramps. Totally fine. And everything looked great. She said I have a great uterus!! YAY!!!

After my appointment, A picked me up and we went to Quince for an early lunch/late breafkast. Im on a cleanse so Im trying not to eat anything thats not healthy. But I ended up having the most delicious coissant Ive ever had in my life...with scrammbled eggs and proscutto and some kind of cheese on good. We had a great chat over breakfast and tea. Im so glad we found each other. I really enjoy our time together. I had looked up the website of the clinic in Seattle and its near Pike Place I told her we are so spending some time there lol And my mom might come which will be cool. I dont know if Miles wants to come but if he doesnt care, then mom will probably come with. After, she took me downtown as I was to meet up with my mom and take the skytrain back with her when she was off. It was a long tireing day, but its like the real start of things.So...end of the month, counselling appointments. Then March 10, orientation and stuff. Ill keep you all posted!!!

Thursday, February 3, 2011

more waiting lol

I haven't posted in a couple of weeks....but really, cause there had been nothing to post! lol

Last week, Miles and I had our blood work done, which I might add was HILARIOUS!!! I had 7 vials of blood taken from me...Miles 3, and he totally got nauseous and they put cold compresses on his neck and forehead and he had to lay down...I was LAUGHING MY ASS OFF!!! We had our friend there with us and we were just in giggles the whole time. Miles said that I had a day to laugh at him and crack jokes before he got irritated lol. It was quite funny.7 vials to his 3 and I was fine. I know, its mean to laugh...I have had way more blood taken from me then he has. lol Still...pretty frickin funny!!!

A and D had their appointment with PNW Fertility in Seattle and came back with lots of information regarding the egg donation process. Once the clinic here gives the final go ahead (ie: my test results and screening are done and PNW has it) then A and D will get their donor list and they can select their egg donor. Next week I have my hysteroscopy and then meeting up with A for brunch which is great! I really enjoy hanging out with her.  Hopefully we will get some other things discussed and plan the whole lawyer thing.
On Feb 25, Miles and I have a counselling know...make sure Im not some crazy bitch whos going to steal their baby lol and that Im mentally ready to do this...A and D go on the 28th for theirs and then the counselor will do up her report and get that to the Dr.

Then on March 10 Miles and I have our orientation and consultation at the clinic with the Dr and the surrogacy nurse where (hopefully) we will get a little more insight into things. It seems like we get all this info, and its still clear as mud lol but its definetly feeling like its happening.
PNWF said that I will need to do injections....which sucks...but I always figured I would have to do that and just had that glimmer of hope that I didnt have to. Oh well...good thing Im fine with needles!!!

So Ive been going to the gym and eatting pretty healthy (some days are better then others lol) but Im still not losing any weight. I know it has to do with my metabolism and its really irritating, but nothing new. So, what Im doing is doing a 30 day Isagenix cleanse to kick start things. I think once I kick start it, the weight will start to come off as thats pretty much what happened when I had my first kid. I had gained 60lbs and couldnt take it off for the life of me...but after a year of being overweight, I took somthing to help my metabolism and the weight started to fall off...then even when I wasnt taking anything or doing much to lose the weight, it just kept coming off so...Im hoping that with this 30 day cleanse, Ill lose some weight, increase my metabolism and it will give me the kick start I need. I dont want to be discouraged.

I cant even put into words how happy I am right now!!! Seriously. People keep saying "your so amazing for doing this"  and "what a great gift" and stuff...but in a way, its hard to hear. Not that I dont appreciate it, because I do, but Im not doing it for the praise and recognition. Im doing it because I want to! Because I have the ability to and because I know I can do it!!! What Im doing may be a gift to them, but really, its also a gift to me!!! I feel kind of selfish actually because they are not the only ones getting something out of it...I am to!!! I feel so blessed to be able to do it. So honored that I was "the chosen one" lol It really is a gift to me too!!!

Thanks A and D!!! Again....I so appreciate you allowing me this privilege of carrying your baby!!! I cant wait to get this journey really going!!! I look forward to getting to know you more and am just super excited!!! YAY!!!!