Friday, December 10, 2010

I had trouble sleeping last night (as Im sure A did too!!) as all my thoughts keep going to the surrogacy! Good thoughts...positive thoughts....Im totally giddy!!! I had to post of Facebook that Im going to be a surrogate and woke up this morning to 19 comments lol Aparently I have lots of support which is so great!!!

My best friend Erin and I talked on the phone for an hour this morning...she is so excited for me and while I didnt think about it myself (wish I had lol) she thinks that meeting A and D was set up by Juli, our friend who passed from cancer and who our youngest daughter is named after. I offered to carry a baby for Juli when she was going to have her hysterectemy to prevent the cancer that unfortunatly developed and took her like. When she died, I thought I would never get a chance (well...her hubby thought it was bizzare so I dont think it would have happened anyway lol but at least I had a glimmer of hope lol). Erin said that Juli is wherever she is (heaven if you want to call it that...cause shes only gotta be in a good place) giggling away at what shes done lol...and I can see it. I totally believe there was intervention on her part here....THANK YOU JULI...I LOVE YOU!

While talking to A last night, she said that it felt good to know that we wanted the same things and that when I said I wanted the baby placed on her chest right away, it touched her as it was exactly what she wanted. I personally (and I said this to her) dont even understand, cant fathom, having any other thoughts. I dont understand how that wouldnt be what any surrogate would want...but Ive only known my own personal deep thoughts on the matter. Ive always imagined, haveing the parents a part of everything....being there for the transfer, the ultrasound appointments, drs appointments, shopping for stuff (baby stuff, materinty stuff) and ultimately being there at the birth, baby given to his or her mommy and daddy cutting the, I have faces to those parents...its so amazing.

I could go on and on and on forever, but that would be boring! Be prepared for a series of posts on how Im feeling through the holidays lol as not much will happen until the new year I can imagine. Their families will be around for the holidays...and if it works out, I would love to meet them! I wanna get the show on the road!!! Im soooooooo excited!!!!

Thank you everyone who supports me and my family during this. I have an amazing family....husband, children and parents and amazing friends (thank you so much especially to my cara Erin,Dan and Gail for your support and listening to my ramblings lol) And are the most amazing man ever!!! I love you so much!

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